{"id":351,"date":"2026-05-02T21:13:42","date_gmt":"2026-05-02T21:13:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/heratlas.blog\/?p=351"},"modified":"2026-05-08T21:07:30","modified_gmt":"2026-05-08T21:07:30","slug":"me-with-her","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/heratlas.blog\/index.php\/2026\/05\/02\/me-with-her\/","title":{"rendered":"Becoming Me, Without Leaving Her"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t
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Me with Her<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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Becoming Me, Without Leaving Her<\/p>\n

Somewhere between her needs and mine\u2026
I started learning how to hold both.<\/p>

The struggle is real\u2026
but so is the love, the learning, and everything unfolding in between.
Something has shifted.
Now, I take time for myself\u2014
a quiet coffee, a simple meal.
The guilt still shows up sometimes\u2026
but it doesn\u2019t control me the way it used to.<\/p>

I\u2019ve started saying yes\u2026 and no.
Sometimes for her,
Sometimes for me.
I\u2019ve started accepting the repetitive meals\u2014
because she loves them.
I make sure her meals are simple and nourishing\u2014nothing fancy, just what her little body needs to grow.
And maybe that\u2019s enough.
Not everything needs to be new
to be meaningful.
Sometimes, we sit and watch something together\u2014
not as a distraction,
but as a small moment of connection.
I am learning to say yes to myself too.
Sometimes when she sleeps.
Sometimes while she plays on her own.
It\u2019s not perfect.
It\u2019s not always planned.
But it\u2019s something.<\/p>

She\u2019s 1.5 years old now\u2014
she understands more,
reacts more.
And somehow,
that has made things a little easier.
There\u2019s a gentle rhythm to our days now.
A loose routine that holds us together.
Of course, there are still ups and downs.
But I\u2019ve started managing\u2014
by letting go,
by diverting,
by trying again.<\/p>

When she throws a tantrum,
sometimes I let her feel it.
And then I sit with her,
meet her eyes,
and speak to her calmly.
Sometimes she understands.
Sometimes she doesn\u2019t\u2014
especially when she is hungry or tired.
On those days,
I pause and remind myself\u2014
Just do what helps her settle today.
You tried your best.
And I believe it now.
I trust myself more.
I go to play areas and parks now\u2014
I teach her, show her things, and enjoy those moments with her.
I\u2019m not just watching anymore.
I\u2019m part of it too.
There are days when she refuses food.
Instead of forcing it, I teach her how to say no politely, and I listen to her\u2014her own sense of hunger and fullness.
I pause and wait.
She eats again when her body is ready.
It\u2019s okay if she skips a meal sometimes.
We all have days like that.
Her meals are messy\u2014
but they are hers.
I let her explore,
eat on her own,
while gently teaching her along the way\u2014
to pick up what falls,
to eat mindfully,
to grow slowly.<\/p>

Sometimes I say no\u2026
on days when she is learning boundaries.
On days when she keeps asking for junk.
On days when she is simply testing limits.<\/p>

Self-growth is a need too.
I don\u2019t want resentment
to quietly build inside me.
I don\u2019t want to wake up one day
feeling like I disappeared
while trying to give her everything.
So I find small reasons to smile.
To laugh with her.
To make these days feel full.
And somewhere in all this\u2026
I see it clearly now.
How such a small person
can hold so much of your world\u2014
your emotions, your energy, your heart.
And still\u2026
I am finding myself again.
Stronger.
Softer.
More capable than I thought.<\/p>

All the fears\u2026
don\u2019t just feel less heavy anymore\u2014
I can hardly believe how far I\u2019ve come in overcoming them.
Not only am I learning to embrace motherhood with beauty,
but I am also growing as a person
while still trying to pursue my own life.<\/p>

Slowly, I am learning to accept my feelings,
and my identity\u2014
learning to live as myself, not only as a mother, wife, daughter, or daughter-in-law.
Not forgetting the younger me, and her desires.
I choose small things for myself too\u2014
five more minutes on my phone,
a short nap,
laughing at silly things,
doing my favorite hobby on some days,
pampering myself on some days.
Because love is needed to love someone.
You cannot run empty.<\/p>\n

I am no longer choosing between her and me.<\/p>\n

I am learning to exist fully\u2026 as both.<\/p>\n

\u2014 Arwa<\/p>\n

HerAtlas<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t

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Me with Her Becoming Me, Without Leaving Her Somewhere between her needs and mine\u2026I started learning how to hold both. 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